One would go to conferences or congresses even in the West. I could not leave, though I was invited, because the party (sector, capital) did not allow me to do that. I did not take part in them, but I sent my papers there. I was only to socialist countries. I went on a professional trip to the West just once, but I paid for it. I could hardly had permission. I could not ask official explanations for these refusals. You could ask for at least a favor to the director of the factory or to a quite influential party representative: to get your file from the party in order to see how "hot" it was, this being a reason why they refused you. I could only imagine reasons. The fact that my wife was a landowner's daughter was of no importance for the 80s. Once, before that time, a colleague of mine asked me a recommendation to join the party. I refused him because I thought him unfit, though he had many ideals and convictions. He was a very influential man who became Party secretary of the institute. That was the explanation why I never left for the West on a professional trip. I was a Party member, with acknowledged professional activity, invited to congresses, but never allowed to go. I suppose that person became my enemy. I did not insist to see my Party file. (A.M., 9)

I was very upset. I met some Polish girls who came to Falticeni when I was in the 10th grade. We liked each other, exchanged addresses, I wrote a letter and received an answer. Thinking that the relation with foreign countries, our "brothers" was right, I sent a packet with a leather purse there. I don't know how my father found out and forbid me to have any relation with the Polish girls. I explained to him that Poland was Romania's friend. I would have understood it if it was about France or Germany which were our enemies. But why not being a Polish girl's friend? He told me as long as he was a Militia officer, he and his family were not allowed to have relations with foreigners, no matter they were from. (I.H., 54)

In 1983 I paid a visit to someone and there I met a German relative of that family. "I didn?t write this one." The Security official from Confex factory, a good guy, came to me and said: "Write there that man went to the meeting on?Put down the date of the meeting and his name." But I didn't know the name.

My factory also had a protocol department, secret documents, a counter-espionage department and a Security officer. The employees of these sections reported everything to the officer. They gathered information and reported it to him. (I.H., 54)