My sister left legally overseas and married an Englishman in 1973. I realized that I had no chance to make a career just because of this. The first impact took place when I was a student. Having good qualifications, I said to myself: "Why are other students Party members and I am not? I want to join them". I tried to find out from my father, who was a professor at the same Faculty of Architecture, whether I could become a Party member. He told me I had better wait. I realized it was useless to try, it was a stupid thing. The second time happened when I found a job. I wanted to work at the designing institute where I work now. My father had worked there, knew everyone from director to elder architectures. I tried to ask him and I got the same answer five years running: no vacant posts. Meanwhile, ten colleagues from the same series of graduates as me (1977-1982) were hired. I worked in an industrial architecture institute where any promotion was out of the question. I gave birth to two children. I am sure I was not hired because I had overseas relatives. One day I found out by chance that an ex-colleague of mine left and therefore, a post was available. My father went to talk to the director of the institute. He hired me after all, because my father popped in at the right time.

I could never visit my sister. I made numerous attempts. I had the institute permission, reached the Passport Office on Nicolae Iorga street, requested audiences and always got a negative answer. I was told: "Indeed we cannot understand. You are perfectly right, you could travel to visit your sister." But I received a negative answer at home. The most influential people of Security from the Passport Office on Iorga street told me to try at the consular department. There I came across some refined people of Security: they welcomed you, smiled at you, talked to you, assured you there was no problem and that you'll get the permission very soon. But you only received refusals all the time.

One could have tried to address to presidency, to the state council, I don't know. In 1987 the institute did not allow me to leave either. I was told: "What's the use if Security refused you so many times? We cannot give you permission."

I think my constant refusal was due to the fact that someone - a colleague I worked with, I cannot suspect anyone, but I talked to him every day - made somebody else a favor in order to benefit from some advantages. Probably he reported to Security that I wanted to visit my sister and never to come back. Somebody must have told this. With this statement attached to my file, the authorities could not allow me to leave even if they wanted to. I am looking for an explanation, I don't suspect anyone because other people were permitted to leave abroad to see their relatives. (A.M., 140)

We filed a claim together. As things were not so clear, we thought that we should take advantage of this possibility too. We received a negative answer again, went together in an audience and, as she put it, there were some refined gentlemen who told us something we easily inferred from the relations with other known persons: "Maybe you should wait." Something vague but very kindly said. Some nice guys because on the one hand, we were happy to have got out and on the other, because we felt we were respected. (A.M., 141)